A young man named Jace Prescott passed away back in April. Jace was a former college football offensive lineman and a beloved older brother.
Jace took his own life on April 23, 2020.
In 2017, a study came out that stated that men commit suicide at a rate 3.5 times higher than women! Women have traditionally found it easier to get mental health support than men. Men can tend to be seen as weak or unmanly getting mental health support (whatever the hell that means.)
Granted, as a life coach and someone who has had his life saved by therapy, I take great value from airing my problems and what’s going on in my soul.
That wasn’t the case this past January. As has been well documented (and even published in The Great Pause) there was a day in early January where I strongly considered jumping out in front of the 3:15 train to Grand Central after getting let go from what I thought was my dream job. I was hopeless! I had absolutely no hope.
This led me to find my current therapist. I’ve done some deep, DEEP work with him over the past few months. And while he drives me completely bonkers, I truly believe the work we’ve done has saved my life.
Getting back to the late Mr. Prescott. If that name sounds familiar, his little brother is pretty famous.
Dak Prescott had a distinguished career in the SEC playing for Mississippi State, and is now the starting quarterback for the Dallas Cowboys. Arguably, one of the most famous positions in all of sports.
There’s a lot on Dak’s plate. Preparing for a season and staying healthy during a global pandemic are two pretty important pieces.
But the most important piece, I would argue, is the fact that he’s mourning his beloved big brother.
With all that’s going on in the world, plus the fact that his brother took his own life, that would make the strongest men ask some pretty important questions.
In a recent interview, Dak admitted that he was dealing with some pretty heavy depression. In other words, Dak is a human being.
I don’t give a damn who you are — NFL QB or not — dropping the mask and letting the world see your truth takes courage. It takes commitment. And it takes vulnerability.
That’s the definition of leadership!
That’s what being a MAN looks like!
I’m not going to quote what Skip Bayless said on his FS1 TV show. You can find his words everywhere.
But what I will say is that what Skip said will end up killing people.
What Skip Bayless said will send MEN to their graves!
It will lead men to take their own lives because they think that talking about their feelings is weak!
My initial reaction was to write a scathing column and put him up on what I like to call the Wheel Of Peasants.
But that’s not how I’m choosing to handle this.
Skip: I have three invitations for you.
- Go to YouTube and look up a Ted Talk by a man named Joe Ehrmann. Ehrmann is a football coach and men’s mental health advocate. The Ted Talk is called Be A Man. And the central premise of the talk is that the three most dangerous words that you can say to any man is “be a man.” I watched it several years ago and it really changed my life and started me down a path of being a men’s mental health advocate.
- Connect with a lady I’m honored to call a friend. Rachel Baribeau is retired sportscaster turned motivational speaker. She has a program called I’m Changing The Narrative which she has presented to college sports teams across the country — big programs and small alike. One of the main pillars of her program is that you are way more than the number on your back or the team you represent. You’re a human being with emotions, feelings, and big, expansive hearts.
- And go to my website — royalheartscoaching.com — and pick up a copy of the book I was honored to contribute to called The Great Pause — Blessings And Wisdom From Covid-19. 25 powerful stories of resilience and vulnerability and transformation in the wake of this pandemic. See how living a vulnerable life is exactly what being a leader is about.
I bill myself as the life coach for Kings. And my definition of a King is to be a heart-centered leader in the world. That’s who I choose to work with and support in creating their lives.
And that’s exactly who Dak Prescott is. He is a King!
And I guarantee you that because he spoke out like he has, the men in that Cowboys’ locker room are going to be more willing to run through fire for him and not care if they get burned!
That’s what being a leader is about!
It takes strength beyond measure to admit you need help. The men who don’t talk about what’s going on are the very men who wind up getting addicted to drugs and alcohol, food, sex, and other things that we use to mask the storm that rages inside our hearts and souls.
Or worse…these are the men who end up taking their own lives.
Skip Bayless is no peasant. He’s simply ignorant to the truth and stuck inside an antiquated view of what masculinity and leadership looks like.
Since March, I’ve been seeing a therapist. I’ve been doing some very deep work in healing from some pretty traumatic stuff.
That moment on the park bench in White Plains, NY was the catalyst I needed to heal some of this stuff.
And it’s absolutely saved my life.
While I’m not an NFL QB, you better believe I’m a leader.
Was what Skip said disgusting and reprehensible? Yep!
Can he learn from this and grow as a human? You’ve got to want to and not pay lip service to it.
Skip: I’m pulling for you. This is a conversation we need to be having. Because what you said will kill men!
